churchworthy.com articles

How We Finally Controlled the Chaos of Kid's Ministry Games

For the longest time we didn't understand what was happening. Game time for any children's ministry is, at its best, controlled chaos. Our game time always seemed to be missing the *controlled* part. Everything starts great - children are participating, having fun, playing the game, and following the rules. Within a few minutes the noise level begins to rise, but this is different - it isn't children excitedly throwing a ball or running a relay. Instead there are little pockets of conversations at that piercing outside voice level that kids seem to master before they can even speak full sentences. At first we don't mind - kids being kids and all. A few of them are bored with the game, and that's okay. At first. As the game continues the conversations increase and we realize fewer and fewer of the students are participating. The game is breaking down. Our game time has devolved into free time. Complete and utter chaos. We took a long, introspective look at game time. What were we doing wrong? How did we always lose control? How could we get it back, and turn game time into something fun and unifying? We discovered three "secrets" that have allowed us to take charge and reclaim game time. ## Stop Playing Games Where Children Get "Out" This was our biggest and most important discovery, and the first step to making game time fun and engaging for everyone. In many games children get out, going to the sideline or sitting in place until a new game begins. It's the traditional dodge ball model - get pegged and you're out. Before long a large group of your children are sitting in a corner of the room chatting, losing all interest in the game you spent a long time planning and setting up. When many of these games come down to the last 2 or 3 people they seem to stretch out into eternity. The final dodge ball players are facing one another down, both afraid to throw the ball, and nothing happens for what seems like eons. Yawn. I get bored and lose interest too. How did we fix this? First, we stopped playing games where children get out. We look for ideas where everyone has a chance to play throughout the whole game. This seemed to limit our options some, so we got creative. Now if we find a game we like where people get out we change the rules and adapt it to our own purposes. There are ways for people to get people back in quickly, or when someone gets out they take a different role in the game. Using traditional dodge ball as an example, you can play the variation where if someone catches the ball one of their teammates that is out, or even their entire team comes back in. You could also make up a new variation where the people who are out stand in the middle of the game and try to disrupt it. (*Controlled* chaos, remember?) [Scatterball is an amazing variation of dodge ball](https://churchworthy.com/games/scatterball/) that keeps everyone involved. ## Have a Big, Distinct Voice This one was a personal revelation. As a smaller church, we often delegate game time to one of our junior leaders. These are our teens and young adults who don't have a lot of experience with children yet. They have not yet developed their "mom voice." While they certainly like to have fun, and we love having them as part of the team, as we would expect, they struggle to control the children. The biggest problem is that instead of **leading the game** they would often **play the game.** This may work with a few games, such as mum ball or Simon Says, but for bigger, more chaotic games it simply will not do. As an extension of this, there is a strong difference between a leader who is fun, and a leader who is one of the kids. It is a difficult balancing act, but the children have to acknowledge you as an adult who is in charge for you to have any authority. You need a leader with a strong voice, leading the game, to keep things under control. ## Get Your Junior Leaders in the Game If you have teenagers helping with your children's ministry, you have no doubt seen the way they cluster together during lesson time. We call it a gaggle of juniors. If not properly *directed*, your junior leaders tend to segregate themselves into their own little group. They've taken their leadership responsibility and turned it into their own free-range youth group. But it's not their fault, it's yours. They are doing this because they don't yet have proper direction or training. They simply don't know what they should be doing. Leadership comes naturally to some, but most need assistance. They need to be trained, so they know what they should be doing during lesson time and during game time. They should be instructed how to handle when a child is misbehaving, or when children are talking during the lesson. During game time, we get our junior leaders playing. They're no longer on the sideline, doing their own thing, and setting that example for the kids. They are now playing along and being an active participant. With just these few tweaks you can make game time something exciting and fun, that children look forward to. Adjust the games you're playing so people are never out. Have a strong and distinct voice. And get your junior leaders more involved. You can control the chaos of game time in children's ministry.

Why We Have Game Time at Church

*What did you learn at church today?* That's what my parents would always ask me after Sunday School. It's right there in the name, after all, an expectation of *learning* something. Or it used to be. The trend in the modern church is to move away from Sunday School. There are many reasons cited for this, from a need to keep up with the times to the desire for removing age-segregation entirely. Even in churches where Sunday School is still called Sunday School, very little remains the same. The Sunday School teacher is no longer an elderly, orderly, buttoned up headmistress that will slap your hand with a ruler if you speak out of turn. So maybe the change is not *all bad*, but the feeling is there - that we lost something important along the way. That the focus has shifted. **It's less about God, now, and more about... having fun.** The evidence is right there with the parents. The first question parents ask their children when they pick them up from the children's classroom is no longer, *what did you learn at church today?* Almost without fail, the first words out of their mouth are now, *did you have fun today?* **Did you have fun today?** The question is asked as if the answer were a resounding *no*, that we, the *teachers*, would have somehow failed the children. That we are at fault if the children do not have fun. *The implication is that our job, our biggest priority, is not teaching the children about God, but letting them have fun.* I could possibly empathize with this question if the parents themselves were not church-goers. The secular world very rarely understands the purpose of church. But that's not the case here. Most of these parents just left the sanctuary, they just heard the sermon, and are now concerned primarily with how much fun their children had. Our church is not unique in this. The same sentiment was frequently shared at a recent kid's ministry conference. This leads me to believe **there is a widespread misunderstanding about the purpose of children's ministry in the modern church.** I'm not sure if this is a problem with how we're advertising children's ministry today. Are we barely more than a babysitting service? Perhaps it's a problem with how we are teaching it - too much reliance on fun, not enough focus on the foundation. Or maybe it's a symptom of a broader shift in the church, with the move toward a Sunday "experience", fueled by mega-churches, big bands on a big stage with big screens, and in-church coffee shops, resulting in less focus on Christian discipline, camaraderie, community, and holiness. Most of those things are out of *our* control as children's ministry leaders and teachers. But we can control the time children spend with us. If we do things right with today's children, then we're doing our part in fixing these problems in the future. This has led me to question the role of *fun* in children's ministry. It should never be the focus, never the endgame. Game time is not the destination. That doesn't mean it can't play a part. I believe it would be a mistake to entirely remove fun and games from the children. In a sense, we would be punishing them for problems of which they play no part. So what is the purpose of game time in kid's ministry? How does it fit into our goal of instilling solid Christian principles and Bible education into the children? Over the next few weeks we will be exploring how games can become instruments of learning in kid's ministry. Stay tuned.

Privacy Policy

Your privacy is important to us. It is Churchworthy & 2Helix LLC's policy to respect your privacy regarding any information we may collect from you across our website, https://churchworthy.com, and other sites we own and operate. We only ask for personal information when we truly need it to provide a service to you. We collect it by fair and lawful means, with your knowledge and consent. We also let you know why we’re collecting it and how it will be used. We only retain collected information for as long as necessary to provide you with your requested service. What data we store, we’ll protect within commercially acceptable means to prevent loss and theft, as well as unauthorised access, disclosure, copying, use or modification. We share your Personal Information with third parties to help us use your Personal Information, as described above. For example, we use Google Analytics to help us understand how our customers use the Site - you can read more about how Google uses your Personal Information here: https://www.google.com/intl/en/policies/privacy/. You can also opt-out of Google Analytics here: https://tools.google.com/dlpage/gaoptout. Finally, we may also share your Personal Information to comply with applicable laws and regulations, to respond to a subpoena, search warrant or other lawful request for information we receive, or to otherwise protect our rights. Our website may link to external sites that are not operated by us. Please be aware that we have no control over the content and practices of these sites, and cannot accept responsibility or liability for their respective privacy policies. You are free to refuse our request for your personal information, with the understanding that we may be unable to provide you with some of your desired services. Your continued use of our website will be regarded as acceptance of our practices around privacy and personal information. We may update this privacy policy from time to time in order to reflect, for example, changes to our practices or for other operational, legal or regulatory reasons. Please note that we do not alter our Site’s data collection and use practices when we see a Do Not Track signal from your browser. If you are a European resident, you have the right to access personal information we hold about you and to ask that your personal information be corrected, updated, or deleted. If you would like to exercise this right, please contact us through the contact information below. Additionally, if you are a European resident we note that we are processing your information in order to fulfill contracts we might have with you (for example if you make an order through the Site), or otherwise to pursue our legitimate business interests listed above. Additionally, please note that your information will be transferred outside of Europe, including to Canada and the United States. For more information about our privacy practices, if you have questions, or if you would like to make a complaint, please contact us by e-mail at matthias@2helixtech.com This policy is effective as of 3 July 2018.

Terms of Service

Churchworthy & 2Helix LLC Terms of Service ## 1. Terms By accessing the website at https://churchworthy.com, you are agreeing to be bound by these terms of service, all applicable laws and regulations, and agree that you are responsible for compliance with any applicable local laws. If you do not agree with any of these terms, you are prohibited from using or accessing this site. The materials contained in this website are protected by applicable copyright and trademark law. ## 2. Use License Permission is granted to temporarily download one copy of the materials (information or software) on 2Helix LLC's website for personal, non-commercial transitory viewing only. This is the grant of a license, not a transfer of title, and under this license you may not: - modify or copy the materials; - use the materials for any commercial purpose, or for any public display (commercial or non-commercial); - attempt to decompile or reverse engineer any software contained on 2Helix LLC's website; - remove any copyright or other proprietary notations from the materials; or - transfer the materials to another person or "mirror" the materials on any other server. This license shall automatically terminate if you violate any of these restrictions and may be terminated by 2Helix LLC at any time. Upon terminating your viewing of these materials or upon the termination of this license, you must destroy any downloaded materials in your possession whether in electronic or printed format. ## 3. Disclaimer The materials on 2Helix LLC's website are provided on an 'as is' basis. 2Helix LLC makes no warranties, expressed or implied, and hereby disclaims and negates all other warranties including, without limitation, implied warranties or conditions of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, or non-infringement of intellectual property or other violation of rights. Further, 2Helix LLC does not warrant or make any representations concerning the accuracy, likely results, or reliability of the use of the materials on its website or otherwise relating to such materials or on any sites linked to this site. ## 4. Limitations In no event shall 2Helix LLC or its suppliers be liable for any damages (including, without limitation, damages for loss of data or profit, or due to business interruption) arising out of the use or inability to use the materials on 2Helix LLC's website, even if 2Helix LLC or a 2Helix LLC authorized representative has been notified orally or in writing of the possibility of such damage. Because some jurisdictions do not allow limitations on implied warranties, or limitations of liability for consequential or incidental damages, these limitations may not apply to you. ## 5. Accuracy of materials The materials appearing on 2Helix LLC's website could include technical, typographical, or photographic errors. 2Helix LLC does not warrant that any of the materials on its website are accurate, complete or current. 2Helix LLC may make changes to the materials contained on its website at any time without notice. However 2Helix LLC does not make any commitment to update the materials. ## 6. Links 2Helix LLC has not reviewed all of the sites linked to its website and is not responsible for the contents of any such linked site. The inclusion of any link does not imply endorsement by 2Helix LLC of the site. Use of any such linked website is at the user's own risk. ## 7. Modifications 2Helix LLC may revise these terms of service for its website at any time without notice. By using this website you are agreeing to be bound by the then current version of these terms of service. ## 8. Governing Law These terms and conditions are governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of New York and you irrevocably submit to the exclusive jurisdiction of the courts in that State or location.

About Us

Our mission is simple: to help churches grow, and grow in discipleship. We do that by creating software, resources, and educational programs for those that are invested in the Church. We are a small team of believers spread across the United States. We are software developers, marketers, and content creators. We believe that modern technology and modern marketing can be effective tools for the Church. - The Churchworthy Team

Nine Ways to Pray for Your Pastor

Whether you attend a small church or a mega church, whether you worship in a traditional setting or an environment that eschews traditional church buildings, whether your church has one pastor or too many to count, your pastor needs prayer. Too often pastors and other church workers are afraid to ask for prayer. They don’t wish to appear vulnerable or weak. We tend to put our pastors on a pedestal and isolate them from prayer partners and accountability partners. Then we seem shocked when they fall. Pastors are human and, like you and I, suffer human temptations. They need our prayers. The Pastoral Epistles make a great guide to praying for our pastors. Below are nine ways we may pray for our pastors. - Pray that your pastor may "not neglect the gifts that were given" him or her (1 Timothy 4:14). Pray that your pastor may use his or her gifts boldly, with love and self-control (2 Timothy 1:6-7). - Pray that he or she teaches sound doctrine (1 Timothy 4:16, 2 Timothy 2:15, Titus 1:2). - Pray that he or she may maintain sound moral footing (Titus 2:7-8) - Pray that he or she bathe themselves in prayer (1 Timothy 2:1-2). - Pray that he or she find contentment (1 Timothy 6:6-10). - Pray that he or she retain their faith and remain Christ-like (1 Timothy 6:11-12, 2 Timothy 2:22). - Pray that he or she steer clear of senseless controversies (2 Timothy 2:23). - Pray that he or she is prepared to be persecuted because of their godliness. That God will equip him or her for every good work (2 Timothy 3:12-17). - Pray that he or she will stay true to his or her call (2 Timothy 4:5). Pray for your pastor daily. You may never know, this side of heaven, how your prayers are answered, but they will be answered.

How to Cope With Feeling Like an Outsider at Church

I will never forget a conversation I had with a close friend. For the past several years he and his wife had been leading the Kid’s Ministry in his local church - a church of only 100 people. In that time, he said, his pastor had never spoken to him. No friendly *hellos*. No spiritual check-ins. No conversations about the children’s ministry. Nothing. I was flabbergasted. How can a pastor - particularly one at a church this small - effectively pastor the church when he has absolutely zero involvement with the people in leadership positions within the church? This friend’s pastor, for whatever reason, simply had trouble relating to him. As a consequence, he felt felt like his pastor didn't care. Nearly two decades ago, I caught our youth pastor stealing from the youth funds. I brought it before the church board only to be told that we should look the other way because this man had donated so much of his time and money. At that moment, my heart fled the church and, a few weeks later, so did the rest of me. Once I left, I became even more disheartened because no one - not a single person - called me or dropped me a line to tell me they missed me. I felt like no one cared. No one noticed my pain. No one was asking, “What about Bob? What's wrong with Bob? Where had Bob gone?” ### What should a Christian do when he feels abandoned by other Christians? What do you do when no one cares? *Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. - Jn 15:4* **TURN YOUR EYES UPON JESUS.** Remember, the church is not the building, not the pastor, not the doctrine, rather it is the people, and **all people are fallible**. Everyone, no matter how much you love them and no matter how closely they wish to follow Christ, they will stumble. When people fail you, just remember you have likely failed people, too. There is but One Who is perfect. **I HAVE DECIDED TO FOLLOW JESUS.** Too often we forget to follow Jesus and Jesus alone. We become distracted by the charisma or character of a person or people, or we become enthralled by a doctrine or philosophy, and we - quite unintentionally - lose sight of our Lord. We are like Colonel Hathi’s company of elephants in Disney's *Jungle Book*. We march in line to the beat of an irrepressible mantra, and follow the the one to whom we are closest. We can only hope that the one we follow is following someone who is following someone who is following someone who follows Christ. Learn from others, if what they teach is biblical and true, make them prayer partners or accountability partners, but **follow Christ alone**. **I COME TO THE GARDEN ALONE.** You already believe you are alone. You feel no one cares, but in your heart you know Christ still cares, so run to Him. *Pray.* Seek Him out like a frightened child seeks out her father. Spend your every waking moment in prayer until you find peace. Remain prayerful and you can be sure that He walks with you, and talks with you. What joy when He tells you that your are His own. **LIKE THE VINE IS TO THE BRANCHES SO MY LORD IS TO ME.** Once in a while, when I see problems in others, I realize that the problem really rests in me. That is not to say that every time others do me wrong, the fault lies in me. That is not what I mean, at all. But, occasionally, I am to blame and occasionally I see that I have strayed. Check your own heart. Have you been resting in the live of God? We cannot find spiritual nourishment if we cut ourselves off from the Vine. Christ tells us, *“Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.” - Jn 15:4* **LOVE WILL HOLD US TOGETHER / MAKE US A SHELTER, WEATHER THE STORM / AND I WILL BE MY BROTHERS KEEPER / SO THE WHOLE WORLD WILL KNOW THAT WE'RE NOT ALONE.** When the church, pastor, or many in the church have mortally wounded your spirit, you may be the one compelled to reach out. Love them in the way that you wish they would love you. My mother always said if you want to have friends, you must be a friend. More than that, though, a close look at The Golden Rule demonstrates that it is not just about reciprocity, it is about *taking the first step*. If you have truly taken that first step, then take it again. Continue to reach out to those who have hurt you attempting to heal. If healing cannot be found, then - and only then - should you look for a church that better demonstrates love. My friend found healing in his church. I, on the other hand, found a new church, full of love, where I have remained - and still remain - for many years. We both, though, remain in a body of true believers, a part of the church.

How to Minister to People You Don't Like

Many pastors and church leaders face an insidious problem that is rarely spoken of. This issue has the potential to derail a ministry or even end a pastor’s career. It is not a hidden sin like sexual perversion or substance abuse, but something simpler and even more commonplace. Today, we address *ministering to members of the congregation whom you simply cannot learn to like, or, worse yet, even despise.* Some readers may be reading this slack-jawed, never imagining that their pastors or other church leaders could ever detest someone, or even dislike someone. Pastors and other church leaders who read read this, however, may be all too familiar with the situation. Pastors are human and suffer human frailty, including character traits that may conflict with others. Many pastors and leaders, however, cover up their feelings very well. Instead of dealing with their dislike of some parishioners, they employee a sort of “Don't Ask, Don't Tell” policy towards such folk, and, as a result, end up ignoring and avoiding them. **How should pastors and other church leaders deal with people they simply don't like?** We break this out into three more fundamental questions. 1. What does God say about such situations? 2. What is the attitude of the one with whom there is a problem? 3. How should the pastor or church leader deal with his or her own attitudes? Those who deal with members of the congregation that they just cannot learn to like should consider themselves blessed. The relationship that they endure may be a test of their faith or a trial to be overcome. God would not place them in such a situation without a lesson to be learned. Relations with people that are difficult to love is an opportunity to grow emotionally and spiritually, to learn to love others more, and to learn to walk closer to our Lord. Some pastors, however, may steer clear of certain people for other reasons. It could be that the aversion he or she feels toward certain people is not dislike or disdain so much as spiritual insight into the people. Perhaps the pastor has seen a glimpse of the person behind the mask and the Spirit has placed a barrier between them to keep the pastor from harm’s way. The pastor should **seek God’s guidance** before assuming either position. What does God say about such situations? Paul gives good advice Timothy about people who are difficult to deal with (2 Timothy 2:23-26). He tells Timothy to avoid foolish controversies because they may lead to quarrels. He follows that by advising him to altogether avoid quarrels. He links avoiding quarrels with being kind to everyone. He relates kindness with the ability to teach. This seems to imply that one who is not kind to everyone may be in ineffectual teacher. This is a valid point and one that pastors should consider before deciding how to deal with his relationship with those in the congregation that he just can’t seem to like. Pastors dealing with parishioners who are hard to love may want to **seek the assistance of that person's friends or family in setting up a group outing or dinner**. The pastor should ask one or two of his trusted friends to join with the difficult person and his friends or family. Share a meal, begin a Bible study, schedule a prayer time, or an activity. Use the opportunity to listen to the person in question and ascertain his or her heart. What is the attitude? Answering that question may shed light on the entire situation. Because pastors may tend to avoid intimate time with those they do not like, they may never learn the reason behind the strained relationship. Whether or not they gains enough insight to build a better relationship, **the pastor bears an obligation to the unlikely person**. “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either. Give to everyone who begs from you, and from one who takes away your goods do not demand them back. And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.” - Luke 6:27-36 ESV **Perhaps part of the problem of unlovable parishioners resides within the pastor.** He or she should ask God to examine his or her heart and reveal any hidden thing that may inhibit development of a mutually respectful relationship. Pastors, pray that you may love one another with brotherly love and outdo one another in honor (Romans 12:9-21). What does it take to love those who seem unlovable? It may be easier to love them than to like them. Both take much prayer, tenacity, and effort. **It should be the pastor, though, who makes the first move.** Remember, the Golden rule reads, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” It does not read, “As others do unto you, so do unto them.” We should be proactive.

What to Expect When Elected to a Church Board

I have sat on several different church boards, and each time, I was shocked by the things I experienced. Not that I discovered any mischief or improprieties, but to see the business side of the church is akin to exposing the man behind the curtain. So to help others prepare, I have written a list of six things you may expect if elected to a church board. ## Be prepared to see the church at its weakest. The average-sized protestant church in the US is somewhere around 70 people, and it is not always easy to support a building, utilities and staff in that size church. What you may find is that church finances just don't stretch very far. Many churches have to “rob Peter to pay Paul.” You may be dismayed when you learn that nearly the entire job of the church boards is to worry about money or the lack thereof. ## Be prepared for politics. When serving on a church board, you can expect to see members of the board at their worst. Some folks sit on church boards forever, and, as a result, they develop a sense of ownership of the church. Because of this, new board members with new ideas are often shot down and their ideas never stand a chance of approval. Board members who have served many terms win easy approval for their proposals, sometime even when the ideas are not worthy. The best way to implement new ideas is to first get one of the senior members on your side. Yes, it is all political. ## Be prepared for bickering and hurt feelings. I wish I could say this is rare, but I have seen board members who I had previously considered loving and kind act petty and childish in board meeting. I have seen board members ready to terminate our pastor's services on Monday night, yet act like nothing is wrong on Wednesday night. I hope your church is different than some I have seen in the past, but you have been forewarned. ## Be prepared to be accountable. Church boards members are expected to tithe a full 10%. You are expected to be generous with your giving and with your time. You should be at every service of possible. You will be held to a higher standard. ## Be prepared for the cold-hearted. That may seem extreme but I have seen churches with ample funds turn their back to individuals or charities who seem very deserving. To me it sometimes seemed cold-hearted. To them, they were simply actions as good stewards. ## Be prepared to pray. There are two ways to make it through your term on a church board: be prayed up and continue to spend much time in prayer, or become cold and cynical. I prefer the former. Everyone's experience serving on a church board is unique. We know all churches are different, but we want you to be prepared for the worst. Next week, a differing viewpoint of church board membership.

Four Reasons Why You Should Want to Serve on Your Church Board

As we previously discussed, [serving on the church board can be one of the most frustrating experiences in your spiritual walk](https://churchworthy.com/articles/what-expect-church-board/). It can also be one of the most rewarding. While much of the experience – positive or negative – depends on the local church to which you belong, much of it also depends upon your attitude and expectations. Here are some of the reasons why you should wish to serve on your church board, and some of the unexpected benefits that we discovered when we served. ## Serving on your church board gives you a better understanding of being a good steward. Many – or more likely, most – churches struggle financially. The average church size of mainstream protestant church in America is somewhere close to 70 people and the average age is 50 something, so it is not surprising that many churches have little money to work with. Serving on the church board may demonstrate to you how to prioritize church spending, how to balance the mission of the church with the needs of its members, and how to generously reach out to others in love. ## Serving gives you a front row seat to miraculous deeds. Our pastor recently commented that he remembers a time not many years ago when he had no idea where the church would get the monies to pay its bills. Yet, somehow, it always did. Looking back, he considered it a miracle that the church survived with its reputation in tack. It never did, however, shirk any of its responsibilities. Serving on the church board is often akin to watching five loaves and two fishes feed the multitude. It is particularly joyful to be a part of the church board when it reaches out and helps outsiders, or those on the periphery of the church, and see their lives transformed. ## Serving on the board gives you accountability partners. Many of us need to be held accountable. I am at my best when someone keeps me pointed in the right direction or gives me alternate perspectives. Serving on the church board often puts you in close contact with others in the church. It often pairs you with committee members you never dreamed you could or would work with. Nothing draws one closer to others and to God than spending many hours praying together over a church project or outreach. Be prepared to find accountability partners and prayer partners among those with whom you closely work on the church board. ## Serving on the church board lends insight into the struggles of the pastor. Your pastor is human. He or she is not a God, nor should he or she be put on a pedestal. Yes, while our pastors should be held to a higher standard (and he or she should expect that), he or she should also be treated like a fallible human, frail in the same ways that you and I are frail. When one serves on the church board, one will likely get to know the pastor better, blemishes and all. While one may or may not draw closer the pastor when serving on the church board, one will definitely see the pastor in a different light. That, in itself, is awesome, because it allows you to know how to better pray for the pastor. One really unexpected benefit to serving on the church board is this: **many people may come to you with their problems, and that allows you to take a more active part in God’s kingdom**. One struggling disabled woman discovered that I had some sort of influence over who received help from our church, financial, food, or otherwise, and began to contact me at my place of business. At first, I found this irritating and an inconvenience, but when I learned her story and grew to know her heart, I found her to be a delight, and I relished praying with her and helping her when I could. I have since grown to know several people who have reached out to me for help, an opportunity I wouldn’t have had if I had not served on the church board.

The Small Church Leadership Pipeline is Broken

Churches need leadership, beyond that of the pastor alone, and today's small church often fails to develop such leaders. --- Roland grew up in a small church. So when he moved away for his first job, it was no surprise that he sought out a similar situation. He quickly made friends and became a part of a new church family. Within a year he was volunteering at every opportunity, and discovered he was a natural fit as a junior leader with the youth ministry. As with most churches this size, there was no budget for a youth pastor or even an associate pastor. So youth leadership was comprised entirely of volunteers. Some time later the youth leader decided to step down from his role. The pastor had noticed how the youth looked up to Roland and asked him if he wanted to become the new youth leader. After some thought and prayer Roland agreed to take over. Roland had some idea of his responsibilities as the new youth leader. He had watched the previous person in the role for the better part of a year. He knew that events were a big part of the ministry. Local concerts. Nerf war nights. The annual lock-in. And games at the weekly meeting. Since he grew up in the church he had somewhat of a grasp on Biblical fundamentals. But he had never truly lead people before. He had only taught lessons once or twice. He had never been completely responsible for the safety of a group of people. Or for their spiritual guidance and development. Counseling was so far out of his wheel house that he never even realized it was part of the job. He had never even personally lead someone to Jesus before. He was completely, utterly, hopelessly lost. --- ## Youth Pastor Turnover > What did the church do when the youth pastor couldn't find his keys? > They got a new youth pastor! It is no surprise that youth pastor turnover has become somewhat of a running gag in the church. Some estimates put the average tenure of a church youth leader at only 18 months. That's shorter than a career in the NFL! This means that during an adolescent's time in the youth group, from 9th grade through graduation, they may see 3-4 different leaders cycle through the position. This is an age where kids are struggling to fit in to society; they're often at odds with their parents; they feel like outsiders at their school. The church is like a second family to many high-school age kids, and sometimes, their only family. At a time when they need consistency, and when they need a positive role model, the church is letting them down. When as many as 80% of young adults who grow up in the church abandon it before the age of 23, why are we not doing more to serve the young people in our pews? (Or more often than not, the young people squeezed in the pastor's study or sharing the multi-purpose room.) ## Symptoms of a Bigger Problem We could look at the youth leadership in our churches from an isolated perspective and come up with a slew of excuses. In reality, it is symptomatic of a larger problem. In my experience, **small church leaders are often shunted into roles they are not prepared for, and then forgotten about or ignored.** The Roland experience above is not unique. I've seen it enacted in various forms time and time again. I could point out where it's happening right now in some of our local churches, and I expect that if you think about your church you could see it happening there as well. It is not limited to youth pastors, either. That's merely one concrete example. Is your children's ministry team qualified to handle children? Are they being trained on various teaching methods that might reach different kids? If a child asks a difficult question do they know how to respond to it? Consider even the pragmatic level - do they know how to respond to emergency situations? Or bullying? Or handicapped children? Even the worship leaders in our churches are often unqualified. Yes, they can sing and play guitar (most of the time!), but are they in a place spiritually where they should be leading others in an act of worship? Or were they simply the only person capable and willing to take the job? We can't expect perfection, particularly with the limited resources of a small church, but we can do better. The responsibility for Roland's failing as the youth leader falls squarely on the shoulders of his church. They offered little by way of support for him. Instead of becoming a mentor for a young man interested in ministry, the pastor largely ignored him and let him fail on his own. (Never mind ignoring the youth in the church.) *Roland lacked the experience to realize how much he didn't know.* The pastor and the church should have had his back. ## The Church Leadership Pipeline The Gospel contains many accounts of Jesus preaching to large crowds. The biggest we know of is when He fed the 5000 men (plus women and children). He packed a house so full that men had to literally tear the roof off to reach Him. He was constantly surrounded by people, to the point where He felt the need to escape the crowd and be alone. (Yes, introverts, Jesus may have been one too!) This is the bulk of the modern model for the Pastor. It's built around the Sunday morning service where a crowd gathers to hear the weekly message, just as Jesus preached to the crowd. It has become the source of many jokes wherein the pastor works only 1 day a week and rests for 6. In other words, the "pastor is a preacher." That's an important role, and one that is surely based on Jesus' own ministry. But it misses out on an essential, likely even more important aspect of His work on Earth. We also know the modern day pastor is somewhat of a business man. Especially the pastor of a small church. I've spoken of this ad nauseam and will likely continue to do so. His everyday tasks may include filing paperwork, running to the bank, preparing a sermon, and networking with other local organizations. Of course, the pastor is also often a counselor helping his congregants with personal situations. Maybe he conducts pre-marital guidance, or financial training. **What we too often forget is that the bulk of Jesus ministry was spent training, developing, and nurturing the 12 men chosen to perpetuate his work here on Earth.** ## Discipleship in the Church Today we may call this Discipleship. I hesitate to use that term, yet it encompasses everything discussed here and there is no other word that fits better. We may fall into the trap of thinking that Discipleship is merely about a person's individual relationship with God. There is really so much more to it. *Jesus wasn't spending His time with the 12 so that they alone might benefit; no, he was also training them to become leaders so that they may eventually Disciple others.* Discipleship's focus is on the individual; it's goal is the perpetuation of Jesus' ministry. The two *must* go hand-in-hand. Discipleship is about training people to be leaders, that they might lead others to Christ. If we aren't providing that for even the volunteers and staff of our churches then we are failing at Jesus' Great Commission. Ultimately Roland served as the youth leader for a short period of time without major incident. And that's the best that could be hoped for! The youth group began to erode without clear leadership and without consistency. The kids had a lot of fun at the youth events during that his time as leader, but their spiritual needs weren't being met. (The church can't compete with the world on fun alone, and it shouldn't try to.) He stepped down from the leadership position, drifted away from the church for awhile, and the carousel of youth leaders continued. Ultimately Roland would continue his ministry years later at a different church, and with more experience, and a closer relationship with God, he did big things for God's kingdom. Roland's story has a relatively happy ending, but so many similar stories don't. Churchworthy's mission is to enable churches big and small to Disciple better, that they may fulfill their purpose on Earth. Stay tuned.